Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
