Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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