...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I deserve this hangover.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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