Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I want to be your penis for a week.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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