I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
