If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
