wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
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