I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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