So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize