it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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