I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
They are going to name an STD after you.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
