If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize