Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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