Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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