You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
