I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
