sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
