I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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