Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
