We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
i now understand why vodka
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
