you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
