Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
