Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Randomize
