Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
