Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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