He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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