Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
There r osticjed everywhere
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
