My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
