Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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