if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
