what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
