4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
This is the high leading the old right now
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
