Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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