A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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