you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
