Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
