What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
