Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
