i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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