Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
