Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I'm sobbing to NWA
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
