The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
