My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
