It's like a parade of train wrecks.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
