I'm drive I can fine osifer
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize