New invention idea: vibrating tampons
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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