we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
