You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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