I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I believe in your delicious
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
