why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
